
Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/12663681.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Voltron:_Legendary_Defender
  Relationship:
      Keith/Lance_(Voltron), Keith_Kogane/Lance_McClain
  Character:
      Keith_Kogane, Lance_McClain
  Additional Tags:
      klance, Smut, PWP, Plot_What_Plot/Porn_Without_Plot, Dubious_Consent
  Stats:
      Published: 2017-11-08 Words: 1279
****** You're Toast ******
by whackass
Summary
     Lance finds himself in a predicament. Keith is oblivious.
Notes
See the end of the work for notes
Yawning, Lance sat up from his bed, throwing his blankets off. He'd had a good
night's sleep, and with a full day ahead of him, he jumped out of bed, ready to
start it. With sleepy eyes, the blue-clad boy padded into the bathroom, hopping
onto the counter without a thought. Reaching a slider over, he switched on the
sink, and began washing his face.
When he realized, he didn't have a face. And the water was electrocuting him,
causing a pain like no other. If you've ever herniated a disc in your lumbar
region of your back and pinched a nerve, causing sciatic pain, then you know
what Lance is feeling right now.
Screaming, Lance shut off the water and looked into a mirror.
Oh no.
He was...
A toaster.
"OH MY GOD!" he tried to scream, but his voice was leaving him. It was being
replaced with squeaks.
"My hot voice!" Lance squeaked, literally. "How am I gonna use my facial
products now?!" The toaster was distressed. I mean Lance.
"I gotta hide!" Lance was already coming up with a plan, and without wasting
time, he dashed out of the bathroom and hurried to the kitchen, where he
plugged himself in on the counter and sat quietly, playing dead. 
 
Keith wiped the sweat from his forehead, a long morning of training finally
finished. Entering the kitchen, Keith glanced around in search of food-he'll
probably have to settle for Hunk's goo dinner from last night-before spotting a
toaster on the counter. Brow raising a bit, Keith approached the toaster
curiously and leaned over, raising a hand to tap at it.
Don't touch my face with your grimy, sweaty hands! Lance thought. He was a
toaster, so he couldn't speak.
Keith hummed appreciatively. "Wonder who left a toaster here," he thought
aloud. "And there's already bread inside. My morning's going well." Keith
pressed the sliding button down to toast his newly-claimed bread, leaning his
face in close to the machine. "You're my toast now," he murmured sensually,
before turning to the refrigerator to find a suitable substitute for butter.
What a fucking whackjob! Lance thought again. Why can't I speak?!
Keith returned a few seconds later with a container of goo, opening it up and
taking out a butter knife. He was staring at the bread hungrily, his stomach
audibly growling. He hasn't had bread in a long time. After a minute or two,
the bread finally popped back up, nice and toasty. "I loaf you," he whispered,
grabbing the toast from the toaster.
Hey! That's my hair! Lance thought yet again. Why can't I speak still?!
Keith dropped the toast onto his plate, smothering the goo over it with his
trusty butter knife. Why don't I start carrying these knives around too? Keith
thought to himself quietly. Good idea, Keith. Keith smiles. Thanks, Keith.
Already, he swooped up the newly-buttered toast and took a swift bite from it,
like that potato chip scene in Death Note. Chewing, he made a pleasured sound.
"This is delicious!" he exclaimed through the food in his mouth, spewing crumbs
all over the toaster.
HEY! Lance's mind chimed in. That's fucking digusting!
Keith continued chewing happily, and like the savage he is, chewed with his
mouth open. Fucking savage.
Lance had had just about enough of this guy.
Without warning, the newly-turned toaster man pulled his own plug from the
socket, and whipped Keith's cheek.
"Ow!" Keith said, more chewed bread spewing onto Lance's toaster body. "That
hurt! Wait, you're a toaster. Why are you smacking me? Wait, toasters can't
smack people!" Keith accused, throwing his uneaten slice of bread back at the
toaster. Lance glared with his toaster buttons and smacked Keith once again.
Keith was now on he defensive. He pulled out his Galra knife in one hand, the
other wielding the butter knife. "Most toasters aren't sentient!" Keith yelled
at the toaster. Lance was pissed now. He slammed Keith's knives out of his hand
with one whip of his 12 volt toaster cord and pounced the red-clad teen. He got
all up in his face, screaming with all his toaster might, but no words would
come out. Keith sensed the toaster was trying to speak, and suddenly felt bad
for him. "Aw, toaster. It's okay. I know you're just trying to communicate with
me," he said sadly.
Lance felt a little better now, and tried to express his concerns with his
toaster sliders. Keith nodded in understanding. "I understand. You're trapped.
You want out," Keith pointed out. The toaster nodded. Keith sighed sadly. This
toaster doesn't get to experience the way of life. He doesn't get to have the
same luxuries as Keith did. The toaster is living a sad, scared, lonely life.
Keith can change that for him.
"I have an idea," he said, and picked up the toaster, taking him to his room.
Lance had no idea what to expect, but when Keith turned to lock his door, he
raised a slider in confusion.
"Uhh, Keith, buddy?" Lance tried to say. Only squeaks came out as a result.
Hey, at least he's starting to get his speech abilities back, he could sense
it.
Keith turned to the toaster, and began undressing. Seemingly out of nowhere,
jazzy music began playing as Keith stripped in front of the toaster on his
mattress. Starting with his signature red jacket, Keith let all the garments
covering his body fall to the floor, leaving him in only his Fruit of the Loom
bikini-styled panties. Now both of Lance's sliders raised. Oh. Oh he
understands where this is going.
"I'm going to teach you the best part of human life, so you can start living it
too," Keith said, and climbed onto the bed. "Trust me on this." Keith pulled
his panties down, guiding Lance beneath himself. Without warning, or lube,
because that's not how we do it 'round these yaoi parts of town, Keith slammed
his ass down onto Lance's sliders, and stuffed it in his asshole.
Those are my eyebrows, dude! Lance tried to scream. Only squeaks came out.
"Oh, you like that, don't you, Little Toaster?" Keith moaned, rutting his
asshole down onto Lance's sliders harder. "I'm gonna make you crumb yourself,"
Keith promised.
Lance was shuddering. For some reason, his sliders being in Keith's asshole
turned him on. It felt really good.
"Yes," Lance moaned out, "It feels so good Keith. Keith, yes, keep going, OH!
OH!!!! OH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT FEELS SO GOOD KEITH I'M GONNA CRUMB ANY MINUTE
NOW!"
Keith could hear the toaster finally speak. It sounded like...
"Lance?" he screamed? "LANCE! OH LANCE! TOASTER LANCE! YOU FEEL SO GOOD! YES
THIS IS EXACTLY HOW I DREAMT SEX BETWEEN US WOULD BE!" Cum splattered from
Keith's erect penis.
Lance crumbed inside of Keith. Crumbs spilled out by the thousands into Keith's
willing asshole, stuffing him like Thanksgiving dinner.
Suddenly Lance transformed back into himself, his crumby dick shoved in Keith's
asshole.
Keith turned around, shock filling his eyes. "Lance?" he whispered into the dim
light of the room.
"Yeah, it's me, surprise," Lance deadpanned. "I can't believe you tried to fuck
a toaster."
"I can't believe you were the toaster!"
"Yeah well! I didn't ask to be a toaster!"
"You were a hot toaster though."
"I know. I'm hot as anything."
The two teenage boys wordlessly turned to rest on their sides, Lance's dick
still shoved deep into Keef.
 
 
The End.
 
P.S.
 
Shiro walked out into the kitchen. "Wonder who left a blender here," he thought
aloud. "And there's already a smoothie inside. My morning's going well."
 
To Be Continued...
 
Maybe not but I liked inducing false hope...
End Notes
     wow my first posted work for voltron despite being in the fandom
     since day one, and its this
     anyway next up is some shaladingdong content between shiro and allura
     because shiro and keith are both oblivious and shiro is gonna follow
     in keith's footsteps. but with a blender and allura. im sure you know
     how that'll end up
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